What a week.

Man, it's been a long week. Time usually flies for me, but this past week was a long week. Not trying to be a whiner, it was just tiring. We were blessed with lots of love from friends though, and are so grateful for the food, balloons, cards, treats and other surprises that showed up on our doorstep, or in our mailbox. They truly made a rough week, so much better. Our family is so blessed to be loved by such wonderful people.

Brooke is actually recovering now and we have the pain med side effects under control. Whew! There were some worrisome days, so glad they've past. Cameron is almost over his nasty flu bug and will probably sleep through the night tonight. (here's hoping) After sleeping most of the weekend, John has almost kicked his flu and is back to being his helpful self again. It's just in time, since I'm coming down with a cold now and starting to feel rather worn down. Austin somehow stayed healthy amidst our germ haven and returned to school today. We are beginning to settle back into normal life around here.

Just when I was really feeling like life was wearing me down this past week, Easter came around. I love Easter. Easter was the perfect reminder of how blessed we are and what a wonderful life this is that we have been given. I love rejoicing in the Resurrection of our Savior. I love the hope and peace that I am blessed with, because of His atonement and resurrection. I love the celebration of new beginnings that accompanies the atonement. HE LIVES! He is always there for me. He will always help me through the struggles I face. He Loves me, no matter what. Celebrating that Love and hope was just what I needed this weekend and I'm so grateful for it.

We are beginning to settles back into normal life around here, and what a wonderful life it is.

Home at last

Leaving Mom and Dad, with our friend the anesthesiologist, and her little stuffed dog, pre-surgery.

Brooke is finally home and feeling much better. She was wonderful for her surgery, it went well and she was very brave, no tears at all going in. (Thanks to our friend Dr. Williams for the great piggy back ride to the o.r. at separation time!) her surgery was all done by noon on Thursday. Our surgeon/ENT came in and told us that it was good that we did the surgery, as her tonsils and adenoids were very enlarged, specifically the adenoid was huge. Let's hope that means much improved breathing for Brookie.

The challenges came after the surgery. She had an unexpected stay in the hospital after having trouble recovering from the anesthesia. She spent most of Thursday at the hospital throwing up anything & everything that we tried to give her. (water, Gatorade, juice, sprite, popsicles, soup, pain medicine...) After many hours of throwing up and not keeping her pain medicine down, the doctors admitted her to the hospital overnight. They needed to keep her on an IV so she didn't get dehydrated since she wasn't keeping any liquids down. We also needed to have the nausea under control before we could bring her home.

They switched up her pain medicine and tried several different drugs for anti-nausea. The 4th one finally worked. They gave that to her (via IV) about 11:00 Thursday night and it must have done the trick because the throwing up stopped and she finally kept her pain meds down during the night. She woke up much more like herself Friday morning and was able to eat and keep down some breakfast and liquids.

We got home yesterday afternoon and she has been resting pretty comfortably, on the road to recovery. The pain medicine seems to work well and she only hurts when it's about time for another dose. It has a few side effects which are sleepiness, intermittent nausea and itchiness. Other than that, we can't complain. And Brookie sure doesn't either. She has been such a good sport about everything. We woke her up twice during the night to give her some yucky tasting medicine and she just took it without a complaint. She's such a good girl and I'm so glad she'll be feeling much better soon.

We appreciate the help, love and support from so many friends and family. Thanks for caring about our little princess!

Surgery worries

I can't even count all of the times I have heard people talk about getting their tonsils out. It's really common. People do it all the time. I have never thought of it as a big deal.

But this week, my little Brookie is going in to get hers taken out and it's a completely different story.

My sweet little girl is going to a big hospital where she will be taken away from me into an operating room. She'll be put under general anesthesia and a surgeon is going to work on her. Sure, it's a common procedure and kids have it done all the time. Several of our friends have had it done. Several other kids will have it done that same day, actually. Many other children are dealing with much more serious surgeries and illnesses, I know that. But this is my baby girl and I am starting to get very apprehensive about Thursday.

There's a fine line we walk as parents between complete honesty and protecting them from the truth. I am walking that line this week. I guess I'm doing an OK job, because Brooke hasn't shown any signs of being nervous. She's actually excited about going to the children's hospital. She's counting down the days. She's been writing about it at school and telling her friends. She believes me when I tell her it'll all be fine, because it will.

Does it not matter that she will be in A LOT of pain before it's fine?

Of course she should not know that she will be completely miserably in pain for days after the surgery. I wouldn't even think of telling her that. She doesn't need to know that. Yet, I know it and it makes me so worried about her. I feel horrible that I am sending her in to have this pain inflicted upon her, knowingly. I avoided this for so long. I kept hoping the problems would just go away so we wouldn't have to cross this bridge. But here we are at the bridge and I have to hold my little girls hand and lead her across, even though it's hard.

It is so hard for me to fight the motherly instinct to protect her. I don't want anyone to do anything to hurt her. I don't want to have her in pain. All I have ever wanted was to take the pain away from my kids. I know it will be short lived. I know it will yield good results. I realize that we are being good parents for addressing her health issues and correcting them. I know all of these things and the rational adult in me will lead her calmly across the bridge and help her along the path as she recovers.

But inside of me, the sensitive, concerned, compassionate, mommy is having a tough time being OK with it. It may sound silly to some. She's just getting her tonsils out right? (tonsils and adenoids, actually.)

It's always so different when it's your own child and I'm pretty worried about mine this week, so send some good thoughts this direction and a prayer for Brookie on Thursday if you get a chance. It would mean a lot to her mom.